Which Sexy are you?

This month's Issue of Allure dichotomizes the different types of American Sexy, so, which one are you?

Tough Girl Chic like Megan Fox?

Sex Kitten like Leighton Meester?

Girl Next Door Sexy like Jennifer Aniston?

Or Femme Fatal Like Allure Cover Girl Fergie?

Bitch on the Road

Tis the season to get the hell out your house, find a beach, create a relationship with the guy who plants your umbrella in the sand for five dollars and forget life.  This week's beach bad ass bitch staple series is dedicated to oh the places we will go and the clothes we will bring.

Euro Getaway: Chic, simple lines

LA Weekend trip: Color, flare, overload the trend and throw caution to the wind

The Hamptons: Classic Style meets good old preppy staples with a little something something to make an uber luxe look.

The Cape: Have hair bows will travel. Preppy and non obvious nautical tones dominate the cape look. I like to dress as if lily had a one night stand with a dirty sailor.

Lake House: Heading upstate for the week isn't just a fashion reprieve; a more casual, homegrown take on red, white and blue dressing

Maxi Madness

This summer the maxi has been made available to the masses, but with that comes a certain responsibility on our part.  The long dress is a delicate area; you are constantly fighting a fine line between looking like you are going to prom and wearing a moo moo.  Here are are a few tips in picking dresses that will look best for you and how to work them:

1. Too much fabric= too much.  People think that the more fabric the more they are hiding but really the more fabric the heavier you look.  Stick to a straight column shape, which is the most flattering

2. Too much print is too much.  I love print believe you me, but make sure the print is on a smaller scale other wise it will swallow you up.

3.  Skip the ruffle at the bottom.  It makes you look shorter and lets call a spade a spade here: this isn't little house on the prairie after all.

4: Little details go a long way.  Mix up the maxi with some twists and turns; a lot of styles have great tie backs, flutter sleeves or even an open back.  It's the little things that make yours look different than everyone else's.

5. Fabrication is key.  It might be tempting to go to forever and pick up a maxi because of the price but then all you have is about three yards of polyester wrapped around you and youre not doing yourself a favor.  Stick to cotton or silk and lay off the shiny stuff... it looks cheap.

6.  Don't over accessorize.  I'm simple to being with when it comes to accessories but long dresses are statement making enough.  Pair it with some cool flats and a simple bangle and be done with it.

7. Horizontal stripes beware!  This is tricky; some horizontal stripes can make you look wider, but in some cases (significant spacing and fine lines) can work, you are just going to have to try it.  Also, this isn't a general rule, but a lot of companies have those giant peace signs on the sides of their dresses... that's not a good look for anyone, pretty face but WIDE hips in that.

8. Be careful when wearing white maxis, this isn't your wedding.

Here is an example of a great way to create a day maxi look:

Here are some day ones I love:

For nighttime you can go a little overboard

And here are some great styles for night:

The Bitch and the Beach

We did red white and blue right sans the tacky flag shirt
This weekend was the fourth and therefore the first real beach weekend of the summer, well, for me at least.  To get everyone else in the spirit for the summer (hopefully mother nature will cooperate and make it a nice summer) i've compiled some beachn' looks!

Beach Look: Au Natural

Beach Look: Funky

Beach Look: This is for you Sybill

Beach Look: LA Candy

Beach Look: East Hampton

Beach Look: Beach and Bling

My Girl Likes to Jarty all the Time!

Here are some jort (Jean Shorts) look... flannel and graphic tees need not apply.

Badass Bitch Staple: The Plain White Tee

The white tee is the most underrated wardrobe weapon we have.  It's possible to wear it and wear it well (read, not looking like the above).  Here are a few suggestions... 

Sweaty F.U.P.As be gone!

I can't stand going to the gym and looking at women on the treadmills with their boobs flopping everywhere sweating through their son's Lax shirts.  Actually, what I can't stand even worse than that is when they go out after that and go to the store and subject non gymers to their unsightly appearance. LADIES, you may be working up a sweat but that doesn't mean you have to look like all hell broke lose.  Here are a few key pieces I've found that are cute but still functional.  And hey, there is nothing more motivating than new clothes to help you high tail it to the gym.

Bitchin Staples

One day i'll have everything on this list 1. Jack Rogers 2. Gladiator Hells 3. Quilted black bag 4. Bow Headband 5. Tan Flats 6. Chunky necklace 7. Mets tee... obvi 8. Gladiator flats 9. Simple white day dress 10. Boucle jacket 11. gold hoops 12. white tee 13. throw on sweater 14. hunter boots 15. havianias 16. jorts 17. studs 18. hanky pankys 19. white skinny jeans 20. Bf jeans 21. black jeans 22. fedora 23. Maxi dress 24. Little Navy Dress 25. cocktail dress 26. Trench 27. Khaki pants 28. RAY BANS 29. White and black non ribbed tanks 30. Birthstone earrings 31. Spanx 32: Motorcycle jacket 33. little black dress 34: Day dress 35: Little Red Dress 36: Navy jacket 37: ribbon belt 38: Gold Bangles 39: Go to top 40: Comfy cashmere sweater 41: lightweight scarft 42: Oxford 43: Great bikini 44: Silk Scarf 45: Twill shorts 46: Black booties 47: Black pumps 48: Jean Jacket 49: Tunic 50: Gold ring 51: Monogramed necklace 52: Straight leg jeans

Badass Bitch Staple: The Romparound

The romper is the look for this summer, and lets be honest... it's a genius idea.  Not only do you not need to worry about an outfit like you would with throwing on a dress, you also don't have to worry about flashing your naughty bits when you get out of the car.  Paris Hilton... take note.  Here is a sampling of the ropmers I deem worthy.

Take note of the forever 21 number that looks a LOT like the marc jacobs one.

Badass Bitch Staple: The Little White Dress

I love white dresses in the summer time.  It reminds me of my one of my favorite books Green Wheat by Colette, which takes place in the South of France during the 1920's.  Both main female characters (of course I can't remember them now... I only did my senior thesis on it)primary wear white, even Camille the thirty something seductress.  (got one!)  So yes, even a bad bitch can wear white.

The White Dress: Gala Party

The White Dress: Bring your white dress to work day! I like that this dress is really a party dress but looks professional with this blazer

The White Dress: Ladies Lunch. This is prim and proper but really fun and flirty

The White Dress: The Interview. Should I have any of these items let alone an interview to attend I would feel tres confident

The White Dress: El Mar. The White Dress does the bitch... I mean beach. I like this fun nail polish color and that it doesn't really go with anything here. Havianias can seem overplayed but are a necessary evil. They have some great new styles like the little faux gladiator ones which are cute but a little pricey. Old Navy or Jcrew flops are great too... the only thing about the Jcrew ones is when they get wet its kinda like walking on a slip and slide and I have bad sensory memory of showering in freshman dorms when I think of old navy flip flops.

The White Dress: CTP (cocktail party)

The White Dress: Boho BBQ

The White Dress: Casual Day

Badass Bitch Staple: The Shirtdress

The shirtdress is essential to the closet of every bitch that knows whats up.  It is so versatile here are some ideas to make this look for you no matter where or when.

The High Noon Shirtdress

The Throw Back Shirtdress (Going all the way back like a month for me)

The Seven PM Shirtdress (Go from work to the bar... well this is what I would wear if I had a job where juice spillage wasn't a major hazard to my footwear)

The Late Night Shirtdress (Need I say more? I couldn't decide on the shoe)